Please circulate this among Freaks only --- the straights are not ready for this shit yet.
(Note new spelling of FREAK)



FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

TALKSPOT.COM HERALDS THE SECOND COMING OF THE DAN & SCOTT SHOW

Internet Start-Up Audio Network Shows Nads by Hiring Chief Freaks to Fill Evening Time Slot

Bellevue, WA, June 11, 1998 -- Amid the backdrop of the rallying cries of the Freak Army and the squeaking sphincters of the media’s conservative watchdogs -- not to mention the pathological ravings of self-styled Net-Policeman Gary McGath -- The Dan & Scott Show is tentatively scheduled to return to the Internet starting June 29, 1998.

Thanks to TalkSpot.Com, the new Internet audio network created by Sierra-Online founder Ken Williams, Dan & Scott’s new home will be in the 7 - 9 p.m. pacific time slot (that’s 10 to midnight on the east coast). Everywhere else, you can figure it out for yourselves. We don’t like doing math.

Dan Schulz and Scott Wirkus -- that’s Dan & Scott for anyone on heavy meds -- shit their pants when they received word they had been hired.

“We thought they were joking,” Schulz said. “Honest. We thought somebody put them up to it or something. When we found out it was for real, it was like drinking a Viagra cocktail. Two hard-ons, no waiting!”

“I like this guy, Ken Williams,” Wirkus said. “He’s either one smart guy who doesn’t give a crap what some tight-assed conservatives think about our show or he’s just completely loopy. I mean, full-tilt bozo. Either way, he’s my kind of people.”

Lance Manload, Dan & Scott hanger-on and entertainment editor left about a month before the contract was signed for the Seattle area, where the show will now be based. He has been sighted on Route 90 west in Omaha with his pop-up trailer attached to his Moped.

“I have to go out there early because I think they want me to act as either program director or entertainment editor or something,” Manload said before his departure. “They really need me to run the place, anyway. And when I’m in charge, I’m really gonna put these bastards through some changes, I’m telling you.”

When asked of what he thought about Ken Williams, TalkSpot’s CEO, Manload replied, “Who?”

All of the popular characters from the show will return including Milt, Scott Free, Swifty Bizarre (Manload’s manager), and Guy Craps. And this just in... Harry Caray will be appearing on the show, despite the fact he has been dead for several months.

Dan & Scott will be leaving for the Seattle area over the next few days. Please don’t try to call them or email them. Most strip clubs in the midwest don’t have laptop hookups, anyway.





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